Romantic Relationships: Why are we engaging in it?

Overtime I have noticed the quest in teenagers, young adults and more surprisingly in pre-teens (if not children) the urge to engage in romantic relationships. Due to my very curious nature I sought to quench this thirst by putting out this intriguing question that I have been asking myself for a while now. I sought to ask this question on my social media handle and a few of my contemporaries gave their opinions. Their responses were great and I would be sharing it with you over the course of this writing.

Again I ask, why people go into relationships? The most likely answers you will get would be that of gaining companionship, to be loved and cared for, to get married and a few others. We all do have families so why the need of gaining companionship, seeking love, and care from someone you are not related to?

My contemporaries gave their opinions stating the need to have someone that cares in your life, having the feeling of it being necessary considering societal pressures and the urge to feel among (this is a practical case of novelty), due to love, some as a result of rioting hormones especially at the early and later stages of puberty, sexual gratification (seeing how badly sexual relationships has being objectified in modern day relationships), people going into relationships with the pure aim of getting married or finding a partner which they might eventually marry, people getting coerced into relationships as a result of arranged marriages which as of this time and age I personally feel should not be an issue of discuss.

Furthermore there were other opinions pointing to the idea of people going into relationships to seek comfort and hide away from their personal problems hence looking for someone who understands them and their very problem, another opinion stating that everyone needs a relationship in other to connect with the opposite sex better while learning a lot from them also, people going into relationships to find partners who would support them mentally, financially, physically and educationally, some to feel secured and satisfied, also young people especially ladies going into relationships because they crave masculinity. 

Another school of thought says people go into relationships because the society sees it as an achievement making them feel special thereby boosting their self-esteem. Also people go into relationships to have some form of supporting system to help us as individuals in achieving our set goals for the future.

All these opinions give very in-depth reasons as to why people go into relationships and I do appreciate everyone who has contributed to this and also to those who are reading.

Firstly, romantic relationships was created from the very beginning with the sole aim of procreation. A lot of people might have different views about this especially the atheists, but this is what I have learnt so far from the holy books. 

Due to constant change in the human character and nature, a lot of other factors are coming into play as to why people go into relationships, thereby changing the narrative virtually every time. As earlier stated when romantic relationship was instituted its sole aim was for procreation.

Overtime, as humans advanced we began to see the need for companionship, show of care, show of love (though love has different meanings and interpretations to a lot of individuals), need for a support system in another individual or individuals as in the case of polygamy where romantic relationships is established among a few other people and so on as the list is endless.

The only thing they say is not constant is change, which is a clear reason for this constant evolvement experienced as to the concept of relationships. Before this present phase of the 21st century relationships were not as sexually based as it is now. Other things like a structure for financial, mental and social support were not the reasons as to why people went into relationships then. Well the reasons for this are clearly seen in the economy situation, lack of jobs and a whole lot of other difficulties.

Due to all these we keep on working hard to fulfill these societal dreams, recognized and approved by others, all to be winners, to express our personal dream, and to impose our dream as to reasons for relationships onto other people around us. Why? Because humans believe the dream is real, and we take it very seriously.

Lastly, nobody has a perfect definition as to why we go into relationships. It is all based on personal interest and a desire to fulfill this inner dreams and desires which we take very seriously. Also it is important to note that reasons people give for going into relationships is influenced by a whole of factors ranging mainly situational and societal factors.

Do yourself well by reading “the mastery of love by Miguel Ruiz”. The book gives more insight on this issue and the ideology behind this whole article.

By:

Olaoluwa Olaitan

laolumi27@gmail.com